Fraud, lies, and Real Housewives?

You know I’m a “Housewives” fan. I love almost all the franchises, but RHONJ is probably my favorite. Sometimes, I don’t know why, because it drives me mental. I love the cast, I enjoy some funny moments on the show, and I have always hoped that the families could all fix their broken bonds. This franchise is probably the most polarizing of the franchises, with “Tre Huggers” going against the non-Tre fans. Personally, I’ve always felt a tad bad for Teresa, as I think she stuck married to a guy who probably doesn’t treat her all that well. I think they are trying hard this season to convince us all that their marriage is great, but the c bomb last season kind of set the tone, don’t you think? I wouldn’t put up with half the stuff Teresa does, and I am left wondering why she does put up with it. My suspicion is that these new charges are going to rock the boat….a lot. I’m not sure if she will be left standing or underwater, but it’s going to be interesting.

People have asked me my take on the indictment of Twresa and Joe Guidice. I’m gonna tell you what I think, because I have watched people do exactly what they have been accused of.

In brief, T and J are accused of, among other things, fraudulently getting mortgages on properties. I’ve had people say this wasn’t a crime, and that everyone did it. People say that the banks collapsed the housing market. Frankly, I worked in the mortgage business, and I can tell you it was a combination of people, the mortgage brokers and the banks. Teresa and joe apparently lied on applications about their income. Do I believe it’s likely? Yes. The banks were doing what people referred to as “stated loans” or “liar loans”. You state the income, and the bank will take you on your word, as long as it looks legit and your work history backs it up. That was the theory, anyway, in reality, mortgage brokers lied their asses off, and bank management allowed these loans through, even if underwriters complained, Here’s the deal though, copies of all these documents were sent to the borrowers, they signed them and signed them at closing. Anyone who tells you they didn’t ok that income is not telling you the truth. They were presented with it, they signed the documents.
If you think this doesn’t effect you, you’re wrong, Every time people get into a mortgage they can’t afford, it touches other people. The houses go into foreclosure, appraised values drop, houses lose equity and people suffer.

The only saving thing in her favor is that it’s clear that Joe forged her name on mortgages. Don’t believe me? Go look up the mortgage images for the Morris County land records. You can clearly see when Teresa signed docs, and when Joe forged her name. Joe will likely go down, but will Teresa?

Some of Teresa’s fans say she is innocent, and I’ve had several tell me she is too “flighty” “unaware”, and “stupid” to have done this. What’s worse, you’re a cunning liar, or you’re just too dumb to know better?

Here’s where I go off of the “she didn’t know” wagon. T got docs, signed them, got on a stand, raised her hand and swore to tell the truth about things. She lied. She omitted assets. She has an IDEA. And if she doesn’t have a basic idea, then she’s full of shit, because she has an idea. Those two thought they were getting over on people, 120grand on furniture, in one spree? On television? Shopping sprees, cameras in your house, in your cars, watching you spend money and keep spending it even after you say you’re broke? Really? If you believe that, I have a bridge to sell you.

Look, I feel bad that they have kids and both are facing jail time. I do. But I also think these two knew EXACTLY what they were doing and thought they were too slick to get caught. I think Joe is a snake of a guy, who probably dragged Teresa into a big mess saying “everyone does it”. Yet pleading dumb isn’t cutting the mustard for me this time. Not at all. I’ve watched people do EXACTLY what they are accused of doing. Hell, I caught people and reported them for doing it. I reported people for forging documents, overstating income, and even sending false tax docs. I’ve seen it. I’ve lived it. I’ve fought against it, tracked down those that have done it, and put a stop to it.

Anyone’s house still worth what it was in 2006 pr 2007? Anyone work their whole life to watch it all crumble when the housing market collapsed? Anyone watch property values plummet due to foreclosures in their neighborhoods? Know what caused a lot of that? People who did what Joe and Teresa are accused of. People that aided others to do what they are accused of. It’s not a “victimless crime”, as some people have dismissed it as.

I wish their daughters well, and hope that the family rallies around the kids during this time. I am interested to see how this will all play out..

Little Miss Jekyll and Hyde

Hello, Loveys! It has been far too long! I feel so awful for abandoning my blog, but things have just been so hectic that I rarely have much time to gather my thoughts, never mind put them all down. Being a wife, mother, full time employee, and member of a Huge family sure will take it’s toll on a gal, especially when she is of the…ahem….non-Martha Stewart type. Yes, the house is a disaster, I think it mirrors the state of chaos I am mentally in all of the time. There is simply too much to do, too little time to do it in, and, well, two kids,

Ah, the kids.

There is the Laid Back Kid, who is 7. He is as his nickname implies…laid back. He’s easy, as far as kids go. Smart, kind, and mellow. He’s independent. He’s happy. Then , there is the other child. Tiny Diva, as I refer to her on here, is anything but easy, She just turned 3. They say 2’s are terrible, but oy, the 3’s will test a bitch’s patience, let me tell you.

Tiny Diva (TD) is stubborn, ornery, and demanding. She whines. She cries. She points to her brother when all the cousins are playing and shouts “It’s Mine!”. (just goes to show that to a 3 year old, everything is an it, and it is theirs). She exhausts me, I run after her saying “don’t do this”, “please stop that” “don’t talk to your brother that way” “don’t talk to me that way” “hands to yourself”….all in vain. Then I go to sleep, and start it all over again.

People look at me like I’m a crazy person, or worse. Someone who can’t control her kids.

However, what they don’t see is the little face that pops up next to my bed in the morning with a huge grin and proclaims “good morning Mommy! I will cover you in kisses!” as she plants tiny delicates kisses on my cheeks and nose. They don’t hear her tell me randomly while we’re in the car “I love you Mommy, so so much”. They don’t hear her tell her brother, who she called “it” earlier in the day, that he is a good big brother, and her favorite boy, and she loves him. They don’t know that under all the whining and crying, is a little person who just LOVES, when she’s not bossing people around that is.

3 is a tough age. Just old enough to be treated more like a big kid, but still to young to do a lot of big kid stuff. Old enough to put her pants on, not old enough to pull her shirt off by herself. Old enough to want to explore, but still young enough to get scared by it all. She is stuck in a strange age that gives her the will, but not always the way. It’s made worse, I think, by having an independent older brother (who if I am honest is like havi a 40 year old in a 7 year old’s body.).
I want her to dream big, to not give up, and to do whatever in life will make her happy. I just don’t want her doing all of it right now.

Raising a daughter is tough. I know I was a pain in my parents’ ass, and frankly, by comparison to some of my high school friends, I was a good kid! My daughter is fiery, yet she is fragile. I want to do right by her. I want her to believe she can do anything her brother can do. She just can’t do it at 3.

So when you are out and see a frazzled, tired mom trying to calm a whining and demanding 3 year old, give her a comforting smile. Know that under a bratty acting facade may be a sweet, loving kid who would melt the hardest of hearts. Know that the mom wishes you could see all the amazing stuff about her child that she sees each day, and not this unfavorable moment. Know that that mom is probably really tired and fed up, yet she keeps going because she loves. She also probably wants a nap…bad. Moms, if you have a 2-3 year old, I feel your pain on those tough days. I’m right here with ya. I’m wiping butts, noses, and trying to stop a kid from bossing her brother around. We gotta stick together and support each other. Be gentle and pause your judgement when you see a naughty toddler, we’ve all been there. It sucks in the moment.

Yet at night, when the lights go out, a stuffed ducky is clutched tightly, and I am closing her bedroom door, the little voice that calls out “I love you Mommy! I love you SO much!” makes it all worthwhile.