Well, today finds me buried in a blizzard named after a cute little fishy. I’ve had a case of writer’s block and haven’t been much inspired. The one subject that keeps coming up on my Twitter feed is the subject of cheating. I know this is going to be a pretty polarizing subject, but I have come to the conclusion I need to throw my 2 cents into the ring. (Unless you’re from Canada, just round up, since no more pennies for you!)
Many of my followers and those I follow are aware of the Leann Rimes/Brandi Glanville situation. If you’re not familiar, Brandi was married to Eddie Cibrian, who had multiple affairs and then ran off with Leann Rimes, who was also married. Brandi has two sons, and much of the drama and hatred between these two women has played out in the media and over Twitter.
The outrage that this has caused from women has been intense. Seriously, inherently intense. Leann Rimes may be one of the most hated women in America right now. I have watched people call her every name under the sun, attack her, and create whole twitter accounts to tweet and retweet nasty things about her. Simple truth, women hate women who go after married men. I get it. I may think that the pure hatred seeping out of strangers who aren’t involved and don’t know her is quite over the top, but in theory, i get why people don’t like what she did. Hell, I don’t like what she did. It was shitty.
Yes, there’s a but. I take issue with a couple of things here. First, why is ALL the blame laying on Leann? Before you try to go there….which TRUST, people have, I don’t go after married men, never have. It goes against my beliefs. I’m not a homewrecker. I am not a Leann Rimes fan. My question is…why is she getting all the hate form women, yet Eddie seems to skate through relatively unscathed? At the end of the day….Eddie was married to Brandi, Eddie made the vows of fidelity to her, and Eddie is the one that broke his promises and vows. Eddie is the one who cheated, Eddie is the one who broke up their family. Eddie is the one that decided getting his twig and berries dipped in another pool was worth more than his marriage to his wife and keeping his family together. Eddie threw it all away for a piece of ass. Actually, he cheated multiple times, with multiple women, and lied and cheated and slimed his way through it all. Yet the blame seems to all go to Leann. Why? Why do we as women jump so quickly to attack the woman, and not the man? Is it because if we blame him, we have to question our choices in picking him? In not seeing the signs? Is it because women compete against each other so much that we are quicker to lay blame at each others feet?
I read a comment on a page the other day that made me irate. Wife find out husband is cheating. She calls and tells off the other woman, puts all the blame on her. Then she takes her cheating ass husband back, but says she monitors his every move, his phone, makes him call her every half hour or something crazy like that. Effectively, the dude is with her, but I’ll bet my bottom dollar it’s just temporary until the next person comes along. Meanwhile this woman was gloating like she had scored the big prize because her cheating husband was still with her. Honey, he isn’t a prize, never was, never will be. You have no trust in your relationship, and no respect if he was cheating on you. He is a coward, and all you have won is a big fat stressful headache. From Messy to you….get your ass a divorce attorney, some self esteem, and a life. Ask yourself why you’d tolerate that BS in the first place, and then fix it.
Look, I’ve been cheated on in the past. Hell, most of my ex boyfriends cheated on me. A lot of the time, I took them back. Why? I had no self esteem. I stand by this: nearly all of our worst decisions in life were made out of either poor self esteem or just plain not loving ourselves enough. I took those losers back, and you know what? They cheated on me again! I was stressed, distrustful, and to be honest, I was so incredibly jealous of any woman I couldn’t SEE straight. Then one day it clicked. I took this men back because I didn’t acknowledge that THEY were the problem. I blamed the girls. You know what? those women…sure, they should have followed the “girl code” and not done what they did. But half of them had no idea I existed, and frankly, they weren’t in a relationship with me. The guy was. I spent a long time being bitter and blaming these women, and what I needed to do was blame the true culprit…the one who cheated.
I don’t disagree that Leann did a shit thing here. I absolutely think she was wrong, but I think there IS something wrong with her taking ALL of the blame when the person that should shoulder the blame is Eddie. It seems unfair to me that he seems to skate in all of this. I wish Brandi well and have no doubt that once she gets past all of this she will find someone amazing.
To those women who taunt, harass and keep the drama going online….I don’t know what to say. It feels like a pack mentality to me, and tbh, the best thing anyone can do is just ignore the problem people. I feel like people are upping the ante and keeping the animosity between Leeann and Brandi forefront by feeding in to it. It’s time to step back, in my opinion, and let Brandi heal while giving her positive support. Keep your actions positive and keep the karma positive. Once a cheater…well, you get the drift. I firmly believe Karma will hit those who need it. It doesn’t need our help.
Just my two cents, folks. Keep the comments respectful if you leave one please.